oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
one might say we're banned from that church
I take back everything I said about communal showers
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
