i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
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