that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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