Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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