He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize