Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
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