I wish i was in the wii world.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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