It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
