I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
When did angry sex become our thing?
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
