winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
