i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
