Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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