I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
be right there i have to get my cape
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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