I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
