Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
