that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
