i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
