Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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