How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
So. Much. Porn.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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