2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
