it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
