"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Randomize
