It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
