she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I could have mohawked her pubes.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
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