We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I CAN MOONWALK!
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
