at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Too much gin, very little bucket
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
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