Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
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