Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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