Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
