ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Randomize
