I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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