i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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