Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Less talking, more tequila
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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