Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Randomize
