oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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