Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
