Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
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