hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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