This is the prime rib incident all over again
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Randomize
