I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize