"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
