Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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