and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Porn is love you can see.
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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