Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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