your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Randomize
