my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Randomize
