I wanna bring you to show and tell
Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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