Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
