Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
