Capitaan dildo arrescate!
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
