yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
